In Which I Am the Master of Definitions (and in control of nothing)

They both ate the oysters, but only one cried about it.

I would like to take this moment, in the middle of my Sunday lull, to address a comment from yesterday. I’m going to address it in a sideways manner, however. Although I expect others to be direct, I’m in no way direct in the way I think. To be fair, I try to be direct, but generally deluge people with information, instead. If I’m paying attention, rather than being my usual unaware self, I notice the glassy eyes of the people I’m conversing with. Sadly, I can’t see your glassy eyes and, because of that, have tended to write in the same manner I would speak. I will attempt, then, to be direct in a sideways direction and avoid my secondary mode of attack: rhetoric.

Due to Vox Day’s linking to my blog yesterday, my hits went through the roof. I’m the type of blogger who attracts forty readers a day if I’m on top of my game, so this was a pleasant surprise to me. I wasn’t, however, surprised to find that one of Vox Day’s readers homed in on my biblical patriarchy tag and left me a comment pertaining to that subject. Aside from the problems with reading a comment typed on a blackberry, I had no trouble with the content of the comment, but it left me contemplating, not only the reactionary doctrines of Christians these days, but the reactionary philosophies of men. I’m not going to write about Christian patriarchy right now; I’ve already done as much of that as I want to here, here, and here. Instead, I’d like to address the concept of the alpha male.

I’m not the enemy, as one of Vox Day’s followers called me. I’m a sceptic. I’m especially sceptical of men who waste time in reactionary rather than in fix-it or fight-for-it positions. Both men and women will waste precious energy being reactionaries, but it’s a great irony when eponymous alpha males spin their wheels reacting against the societal construct and, subsequently, fail to change it. You must be aware that the feminist movement wouldn’t have fully succeeded–the movement as we know it today–without the backing of alpha men who could predict the results of it. Pit men and women against each other with affirmative action, etc., and you will divide and conquer a society without having to shout about it. The truth is hidden in plain sight, as it were.

Back up a moment. For those of you who know me, let me assure you I haven’t changed my ideology one bit in recent times. I’m not at all claiming to be against feminism. I’m a full-fledged Enlightenment feminist, willing to support the dignity of women being who they are, and their right to educate and support themselves as the need or desire arises. But, at the same time, I recognize what history has taught us: that large and in-charge male rule is natural law. Because of their strength and aggression, men have risen to the top and have remained there, even in our egalitarian world.

Moving forward again, male rule may be natural law, but not all men possess the ability to be large and in-charge. Hence, we have the term alpha male, and we have a lot of frustrated men who want to be just that and, consequently, they create blogs where they can be ruler of the roost. They make noise and blame the feminist movement for their own weaknesses, which is the same kind of noise powerless women will make, except aimed in the opposite direction. No doubt, Virginia Woolf made noise, and she may have been right to do so. Perhaps, if somebody–a dead relative, maybe–had left her that one room of her own, she would have written better books. It wasn’t actually her fault, you see.

My point is this: real alpha men don’t shout on the internet in reactionary rants. They’re far too busy actually being in charge. In fact, I know a man like that, if I could only remember….oh, yeah, my husband. As I have a difficult time ceasing and desisting from analyzing and defining, I informed him one day that he was an alpha male by stealth. He immediately denied it, as many will do when their tactics are unveiled. And then he agreed that, yes, he took control of what he wanted to control without fuss. But I don’t want or need to control everything, he quietly reassured me. Of course he’s going to insist he doesn’t want that, as long as we’re getting everything out into the open. After all, he wouldn’t want to lose his charm.



  1. Wait, so you’re saying. . .the white man is to blame?? That’s a daring assertion.

    If your husband created a blog that made fun of something ridiculous sometimes for amusement, does that mean he isn’t an alpha male in his own little space in real life? What do you think an alpha male would do on the internet if not entertain himself?

    1. I should probably also reply to the first statement you made. No, I don’t think men, white or otherwise, were responsible for the feminist movement. However, even if you just look at the way the female vote came about, you will see that male politicians were complicit in making it happen for their own ends and NOT for the benefit of the females who wanted it. Women tried and failed to make it happen a number of times and were not successful until the white male politicians backed them.

  2. Dan,

    I think Jill is saying that white males are still firmly in control, even if they create the appearance of power-sharing with the Hillary Clinton’s of the world…

    An alpha male in a pride of lions lets the female lions do all the hunting and then steps in to take the chief portion based on pure power dominance.

    In the human realm, this looks to me like very despicable behavior, but some men may aspire to it…

  3. You make it hard to be obtuse. I’ve picked up a bad habit or two from lingering for amusement in the “manoshere” as they call it. Possibly one of them is lingering in the “manospere.”

    Why don’t you try making a living from blogging? You would just need to cultivate a punchier,less meditative writing style and vary your sentence lenghth more drastically and frequently is all. Then hang around the manosphere and make apt, intelligent comments which would be easy for you. But I guess if patriarchy related themes don’t interest you you could do the same thing in some other area of the internet. I read somewhere that blogging is important for authors today. You could use vox days nod as starting capital.

    Anyway, your thinking and writing interest me.

  4. Somehow I missed your second comment or it didn’t appear. I wondered once whether it might have been planned by industrialists who saw an untapped labor force. If they couldn’t fill factories with children maybe they could with women.
    Anyway, this general topic has pretty much exhausted itself for me too when it comes to discussion. I’m done.

    1. That’s fine; I don’t know why I brought up the subject again.

      A punchier style of writing, eh? Well, I could try. I’ve never been very punchy. Personally, I prefer to write comedy, but most people don’t get my humor, so I guess I have to admit it’s not a skill I possess.

      Thanks for hanging out. I hope you swing by again.

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